"There is always a philosophy for lack of courage."—Albert Camus

Thursday, November 16, 2006

PlayStation 3 Revealed!

Everybody and her sister is lined up and literally (if not illiterally) camping outside the stores for the long-anticipated release of PS3 come midnight Friday.

And who can blame her or the occasional boy, either? PlayStation 3 is the most significant event of the 21st century, with the possible exeception of those planes flying into those New York City buildings and stuff.

But to properly appreciate the best new game of PS3, you need to know just a few pad commands first:

A=Left
B=Right
C=Down
D=Up
E=Down/Up
F=Up/Down
G=Left/Down
H=Up/Right
IaX1a=Up/Under/Left/Down/Over/Up, etc. and so forth

J74=Scratch My Nose
Za41=Play Metallica on my iPod
J92=Pop Cheez-Its in my Mouth
Ka7=Do My Homework
X89=Evacuate my Bladder/Bowels
(alt+ctrl+del)=Kill My Brother

Important Notes:

---Add a sysstat command to print things like number of clock cycles spent in the idle thread
---Add a psplink.ini option for a startup script, by specifying this a script will be run every time psplink is reset
---Add a uidinfo command to print some more info about a specific UID

(Well, duh!)


Safety Note: Do not use PS3 within 500 feet of lightning, water, a church or school, or a television.


That's about it. Here's a screenshot of the latest and greatest. It's called SuperDeathMatchUltraMegaSnoopDoggDisneySears Mark VII, for lack of a better term:
Enjoy, kids.

Thank God for PlayStation 3. Life is so much more fun now than it was in the olden days. This is a great time to be alive.

3 comments:

Devang said...

Sadly, there are worse things to be worried about here, Tom. The processor this time around is 4-8x as fast as the average computer. It's a steal at $600 when Sony's probably spending ~$800-900 to make it.

And yes, I got one, but it's to run commie software on, and not games. It'll be used for nefarious purposes before you know it though. I've been meaning to get into my neighbor's WiFi, among other things (ie. calculating missile tragectories)... but I'll probably just stick to folding@home on the PS3. Simulating protein folding is important you know.

In short, it's a very fast subsidized computer. It'd be a shame to use it for just games. Unless you ascribe to 3DFX's ideology. You may remember the commercial from a while ago. So, umm, nothing much has changed in the gaming world after 9/11. Although there was that one RPG (aka "shooting") game which you could beat without firing a single shot. It was just infinitely harder.

Tom Van Dyke said...

Very interesting, D. Best of luck in bringing down the republic, you Trotskyist, you.

(BTW, Oz seems to be a lock for the Ashes. The Poms are in their usual disarray.)

Devang said...

The Aussie's are a lock for everything. They're as unstoppable now as ever I suppose. I blame Symonds, he's just weird. Seriously though, it's time to change some rules where it hurts them or something. I doubt if even that would hurt them more than any another team. I've probably uttered blasphemy, I know.